tonight i draw within again

Softly, my eyes close over the day.
Another step taken,
One more page in this book of evolution.
I will not rationalize
or explain my emotions.

My lows are the very depths of undefined
regions of the black black ocean.
In this way my heart can be seen as undeniably
capable of confusion, and staggering clarity.
So deep into this earth lies the beginning, and the end.

My highs, are the outer reaches of far off galaxies,
Light years away, erupting with creation and destruction
Colors not of this planet I am comprised.
Here I am the eternal vibration,
I am wonder
I am heaven.

When I seek solitude
Do not try to reach me.
I am gone away,
I have drawn within.
Trance like, I move through space and time.
Existing.
Evolving into something, and I am not sure what.

The traditions of the sun
The traditions of the moon,
To rise and fall
To shine their light for All,
is to me, what life is meant for.

But what if my light fades out,
what if I explode and burn everyone I meant to love?
What if my fear takes over and I live in a cave in darkness,
dwelling on all of my indecisions.

Profanity! Profanity! Let me scream from the top of my lungs
My disdain for stupid fake smiles,
fake friends.
fake inner peace.
fake love.
fake forgiveness.
fake conversation.
fake emotions.

I'll plant the seeds of Truth inside my soul
deep within my body.
I will water myself with my breath
until the foliage of my potential is a lush rain forest
teaming with life, overtaking my physical form.
I will be alluring as the vampire
and hold within myself the cure the world so desperately needs.