I guess not

How can I sit with bated breath
waiting for you're Hello
when it should be you to wait
with anguish, stomach tight
hoping I might look you're way.
Do I even have a reason
to want attention from you?
Why should the rose
be anything else
to attract the bee?
The sun does not need
our love to shine
The light is indifferent
to our petty and self-limiting ways.
Mimic nature and I need no call
from any poor chap
who fails to recognize
the splendor of my scent.
Breathing returns to normal,
the sound of the ocean
steady in my throat
my three eyes focused
on the glimmering light
around the edges of everything
The moment is revealing
the source of you
which is the source of me

This very second life is the river flowing away from you.

The rains are cold tonight

What is this circus ride I am on,
up and down
so high, and then so low
If I wasn't so terrified of falling off
I would look around
and sometimes
the butterflies in my stomach
bring elation and immense joy
but when I am falling down,
on the whim of another,
I lose all my senses,
I am tumbling towards the bottom
with an intensity
that is bottomless
Is there a middle, a platform I can rest,
or will this be forever
the somersaulting,
the rushing of air around my face
being alone
Did I choose this ride?
Or did someone push me on it
Do I have a choice?
or am I choice less,
powerless?
because I am honest enough
to know I am not fearless
alas, I will wait for the upswing
to toss me into euphoria
an opium high
a breaking of boundaries
a deep connection to change
Changing everyday
every moment.
High and low

s

When the heart yearns and burns
for the one who fit so well,
the mind struggles to intervene;
the voice within begins to yell...
time has ruled against us,
let the past go.

this

All I have to be certain about
are the words I lay to rest
on this page and in the world
I am unaware of the soul
that beats my chest
I just know that something is guiding me
as I turn and run to you in the woods
I no longer know what happiness means
because being near you feels best
so what am I to want
when all I want is to love you
you are my everything
my whole world
for how long can I leave for
when I depend on you so much
I question what other love
could possibly offer me more
I walk for hours alone in my head
and almost certainly I find peace
the endless chatter
runs its course
the stillness of the pond
why am I so consumed
with what is waiting beyond
I do not wish for what is waiting
I am happy
I am happy
I am alive

the ground was solid

You know, those funny little moments,
when everything becomes clear
and the ground you've been walking on
has been telling you all along
only the living of life shall reveal,
the immaculate beauty
the incredible love
which has fueled your every step.
Life is leaving you this very second
Please, there is no time to delay
Look around and be witness
to the glory of the pulse in your chest
and when the day finally comes
with peace you will march
to the infinite palace of rest
every single second is a gift.

the lady who saw the future...

the fortune teller did read my cards
and told me loves nowhere in sight,
i felt my heart break there and then,
i held those tears back with all my might.
how can i live such a life,
with no hope of a man?
during difficult times of pain,
who will be the one to understand?
since i am a lonely stranger now,
i guess you all better be walking on by
i've got nothing to give you
so don't even try...
the fortune teller told me,
i've got too much to do
a diamond ring on this finger,
the white dress,
dreams that ain't coming true..
the fortune teller told me,
i am on a mission of peace...
one where i am often alone,
and i won't get much release.
i guess i've been warned,
i guess i've been told,
that my beautiful spirit
won't never be sold.

Just now

Many years. One feeling. Thousands of butterflies. Two smiles. Four eyes intently focused. Hours of fun. Minutes of breathlessness. Eternities of Love. Oceans of Truth. Millions of rose petals. A pink cascading waterfall of rose petals falling from the sky filling the air with the scent of wild rose and morning rain. The essence of open fields rustles through my shiny brown hair in the middle of a summer's night.

a thought

I am the honoured guest
to the greatest light show ever.
The irony is the illusion,
and the illusion
is actually the light.
Most live in the irony
never recognizing the truth,
of what is all around them.
The same light shines through
and you get distracted by
the many shapes and faces
it occupies.

it is it

Layers and layers
upon layers and layers
of deep emotion
I Am.

The curtainless window
is laughing
at the inaction of this bedroom
that I Am.

A night of laughter
no stars, but still sky
I am glad
to be alive.

Book of Love

There was a book once written,
it was called The Book of Love.
She wrote the words in tenderness
every night,
by candle light
she poured out her love for him...
onto the pages of creation
words sprawled everywhere,
waiting for worlds to begin.
If he ever read them
and if they ever touched his soul,
This lovely young poet girl
will surely never know.
He forgot his book so quickly
when he packed his things to leave,
He forgot her gift of love on the floor
He crushed her heart on her sleeve.
Now the book sits waiting,
to be read again someday.
But this girl won't be reading
or restating any of her feelings,
she won't be writing him ever again,
her broken heart
has already stopped bleeding.
But when she writes another book,
of love or joy or peace
She will keep it close beside her
unwilling to release,
the inner workings of her mind,
her heart, body, and soul.

A.C

What is this constant feeling,
that occupies my mind
every single moment of my day
I am always able to find,
a thought, a dream, a memory
to travel through a while
I get lost in those spaces of history
I wander roads for miles,
That one day I will walk beside you,
and feel you in my breath,
Is the only reason I sit so still
and wait for this to pass,
the love we share is bottomless,
we'll never reach the top,
one thousand reasons for total bliss
My heart beating for you will never stop.